Bette Midler is now 77, meaning she has lived almost half her entire life loving the same man who gave up his career for her. She has a daughter who recently got married and enjoys life as an actress and spouse.
Bette Middler turns 77 today and has spent about half her life with her spouse, Martin Von Haselberg, aka Harry Kipper. When she first met Haselberg, Midler thought he looked like a grown-up and was immediately attracted to him.
In 1984, exactly six weeks after she and Haselberg went on their first date, the pair suddenly eloped to Las Vegas, where they wed at the Starlight Chapel. The event was attended by Midler, Haselberg, and a man impersonating Elvis Presley, who acted as the officiator.
The pair had only been in contact for those six weeks of dating, and Midler had been the one to propose to Haselberg, who said yes. Their decision to marry was spur-of-the-moment, and a year later, they welcomed their daughter.
In the years that followed the birth of her daughter, Midler tried to have more kids with Haselberg. She tried everything, including fertility treatment; however, she continued to miscarry until they eventually decided that one was good enough.
Midler and Haselberg may have had a whirlwind courtship and a rushed marriage, but what the pair shares is genuine, and Midler believes they have been responsible for keeping each other young at heart.
Midler once talked about how she never wished to grow up and seeing herself as a perpetual teenager. According to her, she never felt like a grown-up which is why she is lucky to have married a man who is very much in touch with his inner child.
Midler believes that most humans are like herself and her husband; grown-up on the outside and childish on the inside. She called it the “human condition” and claimed it was nothing to be ashamed of.
He Sacrificed His Career for Her
Despite how perfect they seem together, Midler and Haselberg have endured their fair share of marital troubles. In an interview, the actress revealed that they had arguments before their daughter Sophie Von Haselberg was born.
Sophie spent more time with her father because Midler always had to travel to shoot a movie or do some work out of town. After her birth, the couple decided to make her their center of focus and most important priority.
According to Midler, they realized they wanted to be the best parents to their child, so they remained together until things got better between them.
Bette Midler and husband Martin von Haselberg at Swifty Lazar Oscar Party in Hollywood, California | Source: Getty Images
Given how great it worked, it is no surprise that Midler and her husband have called putting family first the key to keeping a marriage together. Haselberg once said:
“There was a conscious effort to create exactly the life we have.”
No marriage is perfect, but Midler is glad that she and Haselberg were able to work things out rather than give up when trouble first showed up. She also had to learn how to compromise, which is something she was not accustomed to doing before meeting him. She said:
“Listening is very hard. And compromise. Compromise is the hardest of all.”
The talented lady called Haselberg “the greatest father who ever lived” and praised him for all his sacrifices for their family. According to reports, he sacrificed his career as a commodities trader to support Midler’s career and raise their daughter.
Midler said that Haselberg was the one who taught their daughter how to make meals and communicate in the German language as he is German.
While growing up, Sophie spent more time with her father because Midler always had to travel to shoot a movie or do some work out of town.
Bette Midler and Sophie Von Haselberg attend Bette Midler’s Hulaween to Benefit NY Restoration Project at New York Midtown Hilton on October 31, 2019 in New York City | Source: Getty Images
He was a disciplined parent, but when Midler returned home after work, she played the fun parent role, creating a balance. Being an only child meant she could enjoy all the attention her parents had to spare, and she loved it.
The proud wife also praises him for looking after her for all the years they have been together. She now knows that marriage is about perseverance; after all, the rewards are what she has been enjoying with Haselberg for the past few decades.
Their daughter, Sophie, is now a grown-up and has also found her Mr Right in a man named Harry J. N. Guinness. Their wedding was a homespun one that went down while the COVID-19 pandemic raged worldwide in 2020.
According to Sophie, they had not planned to get married in 2020, but with all that was happening and the COVID-19 restrictions, the only people in attendance numbered 11 and no more.
The wedding plans were enacted by Sophie, her husband, and the rest of their family. It gave the event a special feel, and Sophie explained how cosy it was in an Instagram post she shared afterwards.
Life With Haselberg
These days, Midler and her husband live happy and peaceful lives in Millbrook, N.Y., where they enjoy mutual hobbies like practising tai chi.
Sophie von Haselberg, Martin von Haselberg, and Bette Midler in 1989 | Source: Getty Images
They also support their favourite charity, the New York Restoration Project, which aids the creation of green, open spaces in communities all over New York.
Things have changed since their daughter, Sophie, left the nest to start her own life, but the couple is still very content. Midler did a fairly decent job as a mother, which is why she is confident that she can do a great job as a grandmother. She said:
“I will be a good grandma.”
Still, the role is one she was in no hurry to take on. In 2013, she forbade her daughter from giving her a grandchild, saying she was not yet ready.
Midler is happy with how life has turned out for her, and she is looking forward to spending the rest of her life with Haselberg, whom she constantly boasts about. In an old interview, she called him a “genius” who could have become a great actor but chose painting and photography.
Honoree Bette Midler and daughter Sophie Von Haselberg at the 44th Kennedy Center Honors at The Kennedy Center on December 05, 2021 in Washington, DC | Source: Getty Images
Midler thinks their marriage is “wonderful,” and nobody can convince her otherwise, at least not at this stage. Happy birthday Midler!